why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
As shirtless as possible
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
