I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
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