alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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