the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Randomize
