oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
