don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
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