I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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