Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
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That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
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He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.