I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar