I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize