white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Fuck appropriateness.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
