i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
