Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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