just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I wear drunk well.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize