his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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