Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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