am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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