bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I love having hate sex.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
whose parrot is this?
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
