Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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