you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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