Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
