How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
everyone is single if you try hard enough
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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