You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
