so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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