Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
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