I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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