May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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