id be glad to
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
