I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Randomize
