this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
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We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
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I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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