with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
