Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
My bed smells like the plague
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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