He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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