his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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