I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
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