im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
