do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
