We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
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