Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I love how my cats smell like pot.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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