ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
