I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Randomize
