we're blogging at a bar
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
