So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Randomize
