Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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