I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
