How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I just gargled with NyQuil
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Randomize
