So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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