Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
