You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
