Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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