Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
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