u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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