hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
