sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
